If you’re trying to find the perfect gift for the moms in your life for Valentine’s Day, try to avoid items on the list below (speaking from experience), and remember, you can never go wrong with a nice box of chocolates and chilled bottle of rosé.
- A big, wet hug.
- More daycare germs.
- Broken toys.
- Rocks (that are now “indoor rocks”).
- Baby rocks for the Mommy and Daddy indoor rocks (Congratulations, rock on!)
- Rocks in your bed (Because where else are they going to sleep?)
- Baby kitchen plastic pizza.
- Plastic baby kitchen ice cream cones (They make me just want real ice cream!)
- Anything baked by your kids (Eggshells, anyone? Does that count as extra calcium?)
- Anything cooked by your kids’ dad (For probably 90% of the dads out there that can’t cook.)
- School artwork that says, “I love you to pieces,” and the child actually ripped it into pieces when it was done to get out that toddler aggression, I guess.
- A cute chocolate teddy bear with the head already bitten off.
- A Valentine’s dinner that consists of the Queen’s finest boxed mac and cheese.
- Skipping naptime.
- Valentine’s Day parties at school, where the kids have to have outlandishly decorated boxes for their cards (decorated by parents).
- Valentine’s Day parties where the kids come home all sugared up and ready to shoot off like a rocket.
- Flowers that say, “Sorry about your dead Aunt,” on them.
- A box of candy that was left in the car and melted.
- Having to cook anything.
- When I say, “No need to get me anything for Valentine’s Day” and literally no one gets me anything. Pretty sure getting candy and flowers isn’t too much to ask!
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