“Aww, another girl? Are you disappointed?”
“How does your husband feel about having two girls? Doesn’t he want a son?”
“You think it’s cute now, but wait until they’re teenagers!”
“Will you try for a third and hope for a boy?”
You guys. The comments people made to us when we found out our second child would be another girl were too much. Disappointed? Hardly. Having a healthy pregnancy and a healthy baby are my main priorities. My husband is thrilled about having another girl – he loves being a dad to our first daughter and is so excited he gets to do it again. Sure, he’d love a son – but no more than he’d love to have another daughter. I’m sure we’ll face our fair share of challenges when our girls are teenagers, but we’d face different and equally hard ones if we had boys. And while I commend anyone with more than two kids, no – we will not try for a third. We have no desire to be outnumbered.
To be honest, when my husband and I pictured our family, we always saw two girls in our future. We never shared that idea with anyone but deep down, we both had the gut instinct that we were destined for girls. And while we talked about the idea of having a boy, never once was it a topic of conversation that one of us preferred one over the other. All either of us hoped for was a healthy pregnancy and a happy, healthy baby at the end of it. So when we ecstatically revealed that we’d be adding another girl to our family, I was a little taken aback at the candidness of the comments made by friends and strangers ready to offer their unsolicited opinions.
My husband is a rock star dad to little girls – he took our oldest to a monster truck rally last year but he also knows every word to the Frozen soundtrack. He’s teaching her how to play golf and toss a ball in our backyard but also cheers with applause when she twirls in her princess dress. My husband is an old-school, stereotypical “man’s man,” but could care less about passing on a family name or carrying on any traditions typically held by a father and his son – he’ll just do them with his girls. He sees nothing as off-limits for them, and being able to watch him grow as a man and as a father through the art of raising little girls is one of his greatest gifts to me.
On a personal level, I am so excited to raise headstrong young women who can carve out any path they want for themselves in this world. I have one brother with whom I have a great relationship, but I know the bond between sisters is often a special kind of closeness and I couldn’t be happier for my girls to have that opportunity.
I know gender disappointment is a real thing, and I don’t think there’s anything wrong with hoping for one or the other. But the idea that having yet another girl or child of the same sex would somehow be a letdown or something we’d have to come to terms with given that we only plan to have two kids is a little presumptuous and, quite frankly, an outdated concept. I am so proud to have the privilege of raising two smart, strong girls that will grow up to be movers and shakers in this world. We’ll undoubtedly have our fair share of challenges – the way any parents do with kids of either gender, but not one single fraction of me feels like we’re missing out by not having a boy. Our two happy, healthy little girls keep me on my toes for sure, and I can’t wait to see who they grow up to be.
Mamas with kids of the same gender, tell me: Have you ever received unsolicited opinions regarding having multiple kids of the same gender? Have you ever been disappointed to learn the gender of your child?
OMGosh…🥰🥰🥰 your post is amazing ❤️ Yes I had the exact same words when we found out Emma was a girl. Matter of fact my ex husband cringed a little in the doctors office when we found out our 1st was going to be a girl…because he wanted a boy. All I wanted was a healthy baby, & we did 😊 Ur girls are lblessed to have parents like y’all ❤️
People are overly “candid” no matter what you have. We have a son and a daughter- the “perfect” family, so we are told time and time again. We wanted 4 kids, but were only able to have 2, so hearing people tell us “that we got everything we could want” and “at least you got a boy and a girl first” just kind of reminds us of all the miscarriages that stole our dream of 4 kids. Not 2 girls and 2 boys or 3 and 1, but 4 beautiful children. I DO choose to be thankful that we got the 2 kids we did, but their gender has nothing to do with it.
Comments are closed.