A Mother and A Farmer… In That Order

No matter how alone we feel in wearing many hats, all of us wear many hats! I observed it in my mother when I was growing up: mother, wife, sister, daughter, family accountant, chef de cuisine of our house, janitorial specialist, landscaper, volunteer…I better stop there. And my father set the same example: father, husband, brother, son, physician, handyman…

I’ve noticed a pattern in my own hat-wearing life. Each time you add to the top of your Dr.Seuss-like stack of hats, you feel that you couldn’t bear another. And then suddenly, without a trip to the hat shop, you accumulate another.

My ‘new mother’ hat has been the loftiest that I’ve added to my collection. My husband and I welcomed baby Marion Rose to the world in April 2017. She made herself apparent to us when we were wrapping up managing a farm in the thumb of Michigan. We decided to capitalize on the alignment of the stars and make our way back to Dayton to start our family. Dayton is where I grew up and where the little one could look forward to seeing her aunts and my parents on a regular basis. After months of searching for a property of our own on which to start a farm, we landed one in Brookville! The day that we closed on the property, we realized that a few hats we had been hoping for for a while had been delivered: ‘farm owner’ hats.

And guess what? It felt as if that hat was vying for the top spot on the stack where I had put my mother hat. How was I going to possibly manage my share of the farming and running the farm business as I had in our last farm project? How was I going to make the necessary time to just relax and have untimed play sessions with our little one? What kind of example would I set for Marion if I was in a constant state of rush around? After all, monkey-see monkey-do is a real phenomenon.

Well, here we are, three months into owning and living on our own farm, the three of us. And I can honestly say that all of those questions I had asked myself were built out of fear. If I had allowed that fear to speak louder than my determination, madness, passion, or whatever name you would like to give it, I may have never discovered that it is all possible. Marion will likely see me rushing around like mad during our summers on the farm (‘in the weeds’ comes from a very real place). Perhaps from this, she will come to understand the value of hard work and perseverance, while also ending her days watching the sun go down over what we have cultivated together as a family. And the good news about this hat metaphor is, if you have dropped a hat, you can pick it back up, dust it off, and put it right back on your head. Those nights that I drop my housekeeper hat to make time for May, couldn’t be better.

Guest Blogger: Sam Wickham

I am a Dayton native who recently moved back to the area to start Foxhole Farm with my husband. I am also a new mother of a lovely little girl who is much a part of the farm as we are. I have spent my professional life in the culinary and farming realm and am excited to be bringing it all back home to Dayton. But I am most thrilled to be helping to create an environment for our family that is full of love, exploring our curiosities, and good food.