I don’t like holidays.
There. I said it out loud. What I’m about to say may unintentionally hurt feelings, but during this super peppy time of the year, I am a full-on Grinch.
Let me be clear for a moment. I love birthdays and anniversaries. I love celebrating people and I will throw you a brunch or a dinner or hang a “Happy Naptime!” banner if you are excited that you got your kid to sleep.
But this time of year, from whenever Target puts out their Christmas decorations until I’ve recovered around roughly February 1st? I hate it.
The emotional exhaustion. While my hubby and I do a pretty good job of sharing the mental burden, the holidays are an area where I take on most of the Herculean effort. You see, my spouse doesn’t worry about whether we’ve selected the exact right presents, or given the right reaction to make Great Aunt Gertrude really believe we are thrilled to have another set of ill-fitted ugly holiday sweaters. He doesn’t worry about whether we ate enough at Thanksgiving dinner one and two, and whether there is still space for three. He doesn’t worry about overeating and if his pants will fit the next day. He likes all food so he isn’t miserable sitting at that table trying to eat just enough of the food he hates and knowing he’ll be up 5 pounds and didn’t even enjoy it. Which leads me to:
The food. I just don’t like it. Sorry, not sorry. I don’t love Thanksgiving food on a good day. But on a day where something’s raw and something’s burnt, and nothing’s on time and everyone’s hangry or already stuffed? Blech.
The expectations. Everyone has them. I can’t make everyone happy, and no amount of trying gets us there. I also can’t just mutiny and hide in bed.
The busy-ness. I dream of sitting peacefully by a fire and listening to carols while relaxing with a cup of hot cocoa. What actually happens? Sitting in the living room at midnight frantically wrapping gifts or sorting out logistics or fielding harried text messages.
I think I’ve hidden my Grinchy-ness from everyone except my spouse pretty well. However, now that I’m a Mom, I have to hide it twice as much because I want my kid to get all of the holiday magic.
I’m still learning how to let my heart grow a few sizes this season, but here’s how I’ve fought my inner Grinch in the last few years:
- Setting boundaries and expectations ahead of time – for my family but also for myself. I am a classic “yes” girl, so setting limits to what I take on and agree to helps me stay a bit more mindful of my time and energy.
- Just saying yes – to Christmas music in November. To not counting calories on Thanksgiving. To embracing traditions new and old. To sending snail mail cards.
- Did numbers 1 and 2 seem contrary to each other? So my third tip is being super organized. I’ve already bought half my Christmas presents, I’m working on our Thanksgiving schedule, and I’ve assigned my spouse things to worry about – just kidding, but only mostly.
- Be thankful, grateful, humble, and open to opportunities to share. Really, isn’t that what we all need to fight our inner Grinch?
How do you feel about the holidays? Love them? Hate them? Are you a secret Grinch-mom like me?
I love this perspective, Sasha! And I’m someone who enjoys the holidays! But so many of your points resonate with me as well – especially the emotionally exhausting aspect! I’m all for assigning my husband his own tasks to worry about too!
One thing that helped my stress is date night in present wrapping. The Saturday night before Christmas, after the kids are in bed, we get some adult drinks, put on Scrooged with Bill Murray. Then together we wrap all our Christmas presents to the kids, Grandmas, uncles, etc. I look forward to it every year….and atleast my husband knows what we bought everyone.
I’m so with you on this! I think the thing that gets me the most is the materialism that comes with the holidays. It’s the hardest time of the year to “keep up with the Jones'” and I literally feel like I never can or will! It’s taken me years (and I’m still working on it) to figure out how to NOT waste my time and energy doing that!
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