The Last Child

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When I was younger, I often would say that I did not want kids. Now, at 37, I have been blessed with two beautiful boys. I have come to the realization that I am grieving the choice to not have another baby. It seems like everyone warns you about your first baby but no one prepares you for your last.

I often see people with babies and my ovaries start aching!

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Seeing other people’s kids reach their first milestones, like rolling over, crawling, and walking, stir up different emotions within me. At times, I wish I could go back and experience my own kids’ first moments all over again.

Packing up all the onesies, old toys, and bassinet brings a deep sense of sadness. You quickly realize that you will never have another baby to pass down hand me downs, or another sleeping in your room.

Currently I have been soaking up all the moments with my soon to be 3-year-old, my last child.

Time feels like it has flown by, and I find myself wondering why time is such a thief. It feels like just yesterday I was watching him take his first steps and now I am watching his vocabulary develop, and seeing his love of soccer blossom.

Soak in all the wonderful moments and stay present. Take pictures so that one day you can look back and remember just how little they were. Before you know it, your babies will be grown and you will be reflecting on their firsts.